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Turning the Tables on a Female Phobic
By Susan T Spencer, Guest Blogger
I can spot a female phobic a mile away….can you? This is a man who will not recognize women as qualified businesspersons and therefore refuses to do business with them directly. They may not be consciously aware of why they do what they do, but such men put these women down, ignore them, or otherwise marginalize them—in blatant or subtle ways—thus limiting their business opportunities. Women need to identify female-phobic men and find a way around them . . . because they will never change! Let me tell you about my experience with La Femme Phobique As the owner of a successful food distribution company in Atlantic City, New Jersey, I presented my meat products to many casino chefs. Most of the chefs had never dealt with a distributor who was a woman, let alone one who sold meat products, but once they sampled the natural veal cutlets and prime steaks I brought, they treated me the same way they would any other meat distributor. One chef, however, wouldn’t give me the time of day: François was a man who had studied with some of the most famous chefs in Paris. The first time I went to see François, he turned his back on me, barked orders to his two sous-chefs, and even took a personal phone call while I was in his office. None of the other chefs I’d met with had ever given me anything but their undivided attention. So, it was clear to me that François was a hard-core male who had an incurable anti-woman bias and that he had already made up his mind before our meeting a woman could not offer him anything of interest. After giving it my best shot and getting nothing but disrespectful treatment in return, I politely said my “thank-yous” to François and the sous-chefs, who nodded sheepishly as I left. Overcoming Bias I was determined to sell to François. His restaurants were the largest users of fresh, natural veal in Atlantic City, and I knew I had a product that was not only of better quality but also substantially less expensive. I just had to figure out how to get around his all too apparent bias against businesswomen. In the course of getting my food distribution business up and running, I’d met and befriended a young liquor salesman. Frankie was handsome, suave, always well dressed, relatively articulate . . . and male—exactly the kind of person I thought François would listen to. I told Frankie of my situation and asked if he’d be willing to help me out. I let him know up front that if he’d meet with François and me, and was able to get the chef to buy my veal, I’d arrange for him and a guest to dine at the Sands Casino (one of my best customers), at the gourmet restaurant of his choice. Now, Frankie knew nothing about veal other than what I explained to him thirty minutes before the meeting, but François listened to Frankie as if he were a professor. As for me, I stood in the background and said nothing. In no time, Frankie convinced François to sample the veal. By the end of the meeting, I had the business. When dealing with female-phobic men, don’t give up, simply add a “token” male to the equation and succeed by beating them at their own game! Susan T Spencer is the author of Briefcase Essentials, copyright@2011 Susan T Spencer This excerpt is included as part of a chapter on Bullies and female phobics. About the Author  An attorney, business owner and speaker, Susan Spencer is the author of the new book Briefcase Essentials: Discover Your 12 Natural Talents for Achieving Success in a Male-Dominated Workplace. She has previously served as the VP and General Manager of the Philadelphia Eagles and went on to own and operate Allied Steaks for more than 20 years. Currently, Spencer is a guest lecturer at UNLV’s School of Entrepreneurship, she hosts a radio show, owns a meat commodities trading company, and has started a lecture series for health-care professionals in Nevada. Buy Now Is this helpful? Please let us know in the comments your thoughts on this as well as other ways we can help you with your career and training. blog comments powered by Disqus |